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In 1969, Robert Plant famously sang: “Don’t know where you’re goin’, only know just where you’ve been”. Even for those that don’t listen to Led Zeppelin on a regular basis, there is some truth to be found here. When a financial advisor attempts to build a relationship with his client, it is useful to ask what sort of footprint that client wants to leave behind. In fact, it is a question that must be asked, if any dialogue is to take place at all.

Financial advisors frequently ask me where that dialogue begins, and I believe the first step is identifying what the ideal client looks like. The ideal client is someone with whom you are familiar, whose name you know, whose kids’ names you know, and who you are excited to meet with-whether it is at the store or in a professional setting. It is, in short, somebody you are comfortable with; in whom you have an interest that goes far beyond numbers and graphics. Only once an advisor reaches that comfort zone can he or she determine if the client is open to having an in-depth dialogue. This, however, requires a different type of investment on the part of both the advisor and the client.

At the True Wealth Institute, we have developed a holistic screening process that defines the parameters of the client-advisor relationship. In financial planning, we not only focus on the changing trends in the financial services profession, but we also research health, happiness, and knowledge. The client who achieves True Wealth lives a life that focuses on more than merely their bottom line. The financial advisor is instrumental in making the client understand what True Wealth is about, namely, all that money cannot buy, and all that death cannot take away.

Memories, relationships, family, and personal legacy are all concepts that fit into this category. Not many advisors ask their clients about these concepts, and not many clients are willing to bring these issues to the table when discussing their financial health. Many successful people do not want to take the time to think about where they are headed, and are not ready to have a conversation that goes beyond cold hard cash. We at the True Wealth Institute want to change that. The question is, how? How do we line up a client’s needs with a client’s wants? How does an advisor help a client understand what Robert Plant was singing about? How do we make them see they can’t know where they are going, until they know where they have been?

I work with an advisor in the Phoenix area who had decided that the depths of the relationships that he had with his clients weren’t really what he was looking for but he didn’t know how to take it to the next level. After attending the True Wealth Institute he gave me a call and said that he had done a blue-printing retreat, which is asking of series of in-depth questions about, again, where people want to go, what they want to do, what they want their lives to look like. He took it one-step farther, he did it with the parents, the children, and the grandchildren of this family, and they were 10 people there. What this ended up doing for him as an advisor is allowed him to build a multi generational relationship and also at the end of the day the children turned to the advisor and said: you are going to be our family’s advisor and not only will you be our family’s advisor but we want to make sure that because you provided this level of service, this level of questioning, this level of desire to get to know who we are: we would like for you to be introduce to — and they provided multiple referrals. Just by opening up the dialogue by having the right questions, by feeling comfortable facilitating this conversation, this person, this advisor will be able to replicate as best of the best clients and also go to work happy because he’s making a difference in their lives.

When a client is willing to start a dialogue about the quality of his life, the advisor will be asking many unexpected questions. Guiding the client involves using these three True Wealth principles: Values, Meaningful Purpose, and Goal Setting. In order for a client to discover his values, he needs to ask himself what motivates his decisions about his money and his life. To discover his meaningful purpose, the client needs to know why he is on this planet. Finally, the client needs to have a vision of where he is going, based on how he answered the first two questions. Thus, he arrives at systematic goal setting.

After the financial advisor and the client have built this relationship, amazing things happen. Clients are no longer focused solely on rates of return; they are focused on the goals you set together.

An entirely new level of trust is created, and isn’t that what all advisors want? With this trust comes a – hopefully – lifelong commitment on both the client’s and the advisor’s part.

This conversation, as well as the ensuing relationship will be life long. The advisor, by learning about the client’s non-monetary goals, and helping him achieve those goals, will actually help change the client’s quality of life.

Another advisor that I coach came back and said to me you will not believe what happened. One of his clients that he has had such a wonderful relationship that he’s taken through the true wealth process that he’s asked the right questions and built this very very in-depth relationship with, when the market had gone down successively late last year. Things were looking really bad. He arrived at his office and there was a package waiting for him. He opened up the package and it had Mylanta, it had Roll-aids it had some headache pills and it had some Alka-Seltzer and there was — said, I know you are taking this harder than we are. And of course, he calls up this client and says, you know, thank you so much for the care package and the client said, you know what, you have done such a great job of teaching us what’s important in life that we know that there will be substantial market fluctuations. We know that there is a potential for us to lose money, but even though that we are in the process of losing money, our goals and our focus are still the same. We are still going to be able to achieve our goals because they weren’t just monetary goals. Money was just a tool to get there faster. It might take us a little longer now, but the focus is still there; my family, my friends, and my hobbies. Thank you for that. I hope that you don’t need any of these medications.

Finally, the question of how to implement all this information into a working financial plan has to be addressed. The True Wealth Institute offers a written plan that encompasses financial as well as personal goals. Treating both types of goals as an inseparable entity provides the key for follow-up. To put it simply, clients aren’t in it strictly for the money, but for what that money can do for them. When you, the advisor, measure a client’s financial growth, you simultaneously measure whether that client can reach his personal goals. When you measure the dollars, you measure whether your client can afford that vacation, that new house, or whether he is able to send his kids through college. Remember; those are the same kids you so diligently learned the names of in the beginning. Measuring goals rather than the bottom line, allows you to keep the client motivated.

Combine this with prioritizing the relationship in your client’s mind, through consistent phone calls, and a reiteration of their values, meaningful purpose, and systematic goal setting, and you will keep your client on track. Your clients will not only know where they have been, but they will know exactly where they are going; they will understand that life needs to be lived with intention, and not by accident.